My GPS sucks.
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How does it feel? How does it feel? To be all alone? With your cover blown? Your collusion shown? A complete self-own? Like a Roger Stone.
I shudder to think what Jesus would go through if he went to a Catholic high school.
Atheists who mock Me as "your imaginary friend" are wrong. I'm not your friend.
It is a pointless waste of energy to worry about the past. The future though, holy shit.
I'm going to trade you for a planet that's younger and hotter.
Money can't buy happiness, but love can't buy a Ferrari either.
Nice to know that somewhere out there is a truly sensitive man.

Sex is a beautiful but sacred thing and you shouldn’t have it until you and your partner are absolutely sure you're horny.
Retweet this and you'll go to heaven. Yes, the standards are now that low.
I am shutting down the universe until you pay to build a wall around it.
The Bible is a great moral code until you start to read it.
One day people will start a religion based on My son's actual teachings.
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